Ashley
When you eventually find the courage to venture up North, you may need a suitabell "getup"
Out of sheer sympathy and politeness……You need to look like "one of us"
May we therefore, recommend the following…….
Baggy trousers……..To keep your Ferrets warm
An old army Great Coat………To keep you warm
A pair of leather sparking clogs, but not the wooden ones, you normally wear……..Correctly marked…L and R
Extensive Tattooing…….You may get away with artistic use of a blue Biro……Dragons, Chinese symbols or Barbed wire etc, but definitely not Saxophones!
A Tommy Cooper fez……As you don't want to stand out in a crowd
A large pocketful of Pigeon food……Just in case you get spotted
Man Utd home strip…….The red one
Sleeoing bag……In case you fancy stopping the night
On arrival at Haydock……Look for a side door marked " Keep out" and recite Bob's contraversial poem……"I'm the greatest…..etc"……… and you've got in for nowt………..Just like that!
Can't do better than that, Sunshine
Bob and Paul